Low-budget movie mogul Roger Corman arrives at the campfire with a proposition for HP Lovecraft. Full episodes begin on October 31st.
Papier-mâché blockbuster filmmaker Roger Corman arrives at the Pals' campfire with a proposition to adapt one of HP Lovecraft's novellas into a movie of an Edgar Allan Poe story, in our latest teaser micro-episode. Submitted for the Approval of the Midnight Pals' first season begins releasing full episodes weekly from October 31st.
CAST
Script and production by Robin Johnson, including material adapted from tweets by Bitter Karella.
Notes concerning Roger Corman's Edgar Allan Poe's HP Lovecraft's The Haunted Palace: The real-life Roger Corman did indeed make a movie adaptation of Lovecraft's short novel The Case of Charles Dexter Ward which was released under the title Edgar Allan Poe's The Haunted Palace (1963) so that it could be marketed as part of Corman's infamous "Poe Cycle". Edgar Allan Poe did write a six-stanza poem called The Haunted Palace, which has nothing in common with Corman's movie except that Vincent Price's character quotes four lines of it at some point for no particular reason. Poe's name is misspelled as "Edgar Allen Poe" in the film's credits. It's Corman in his most truly Cormanic episode.
Midnight Pals characters are written as parodies and do not necessarily represent their real-life counterparts.
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A transcript of this mini-episode is available at https://midnight-pals.simplecast.com/episodes/teaser-08-roger-corman/transcript
[SPOOKY MUSIC, BELLS CHIMING]
VOICEOVER: Submitted for the Approval of the Midnight Pals, created by Bitter Karella.
[FADE IN AMBIENT SOUNDS OF A FOREST AT NIGHT, WITH A CAMPFIRE CRACKLING.]
EDGAR ALLAN POE: Submitted for the Approval of the Midnight—whoah!
[SUDDEN SOUND OF A CAR PULLING UP, ITS BADLY MAINTAINED BRAKES SQUEAKING. CLATTERING OF WOOD. THROUGHOUT THE SCENE THE STATIONARY CAR ENGINE NOISE KEEPS RUNNING, AND THE FIRE SOUND INCREASES VERY GRADUALLY.]
DEAN KOONTZ: Hey! You drove over our campfire!
HP LOVECRAFT: Who drives to a campfire in a limousine?
CLIVE BARKER: That’s not a limo. It’s two station wagons connected together with cardboard sheets.
POE: Ugh. Roger Corman.
[SOUND OF AN OLD-FASHIONED CAR WINDOW BEING MANUALLY WOUND OPEN.]
ROGER CORMAN: [GRAVELLY HOLLYWOOD SLEAZEBALL VOICE] Edgar! Baby!
POE: I told you Roger, I’m not letting you adapt any more of my stories into movies.
CORMAN: No problemo, Edgar! It’s not you I’m here to see. Is Howard around?
LOVECRAFT: M-Me?
CORMAN: Howard! Howie, baby! I’m gonna make you a star!
LOVECRAFT: Really?
POE: Howard
CORMAN: Have a cigar, Howie!
[SPARKS OF LIGHTER.]
POE: Howard, it’s Roger.
LOVECRAFT: (COUGHING)
CORMAN: Have I got a proposition for you!
LOVECRAFT: (STILL COUGHING) Uh. Have you?
CORMAN: We’re gonna make a movie outta your book, The Case of Charles Dexter Ward!
LOVECRAFT: Oh wow!
CORMAN: Uh, we might gotta do a little something about that title though.
LOVECRAFT: Oh, okay. How about... Notes Concerning the Mystery of the Case of—
CORMAN: (INTERRUPTING) The Haunted Palace!
LOVECRAFT: What?
CORMAN: No, wait... Edgar Allan Poe’s "The Haunted Palace"!
POE: What?
LOVECRAFT: Couldn’t you at least make it HP Lovecraft’s "The Haunted Palace"?
CORMAN: Oh. Ohhhhh. (PAUSE) No can do, kiddo.
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACH]
MARY SHELLEY: (ARRIVING) ’Sup fuckers
CLIVE: Hey, Mary.
SHELLEY: Why’s there a cardboard limo on the campfire? What is this, The Wicker Executive?
POE: It’s Roger Corman. He wants to make a movie out of Howard’s—
SHELLEY: Corman?
CORMAN: (TERRIFIED) Aaaah...
SHELLEY: (COOLLY) Didn’t you make Frankenstein Unbound? [SNAP OF SWITCHBLADE]
CORMAN: I gotta go! [WINDING CAR WINDOW UP] Uh, we’ll do lunch, Howie!
[CAR SCREECHES OFF INTO THE DISTANCE.]
CLIVE: (CALLING) I think your limo’s on fire!
[THEME MUSIC PLAYS.]
VOICEOVER: Submitted for the Approval of the Midnight Pals, coming Halloween 2023 to wherever you find podcasts. Find us at https://midnightpals.com